Chicago Prepares for Trump’s Deportation Circus

By Jericho Jake Slade, WPS News
Baybay City | January 21, 2025

Well, here we are, folks! Chicago is about to become the grand stage for the latest act in President Trump’s ongoing deportation show. Who doesn’t love a little drama? In a spectacular display of compassion and human rights, our dear leader is gearing up for what has been touted as the “largest deportation effort in U.S. history.” Bravo, Mr. President, truly remarkable!

As if the city didn’t have enough to handle, sanctuary cities like Chicago are set to be the main targets starting next week. That’s right, folks—get ready for some good old-fashioned immigrant roundups while the residents go about their daily lives. Why enjoy a peaceful Tuesday when you can be terrorized by ICE agents?

In the vibrant Pilsen neighborhood, local leaders and immigrant rights advocates held a foot-stomping pep rally this morning to prepare the community for the impending chaos. Mari Rodriguez, a newcomer from Venezuela who makes tamales that could make a grown man weep, shared her fears about the incoming ICE operations. “There are good days and bad,” she said, clutching her tamale cart like a lifeline. Who could blame her? The irony of a community that thrives on diversity now gripping onto fear is just delectable.

With reports suggesting that up to 200 ICE officers will be gracing Chicago with their presence, it seems like party time is just around the corner! Though there’s no official statement confirming when exactly the raid will kick off, local activist Tom DeVore issued a reassurance: “It’s crucial to remain calm and prepared.” Because nothing screams calm like knowing you could be deported at any moment!

Ah, the nostalgia! Chicago has experienced ICE raids in the past, but this time it feels like we’re not just revisiting an old album—we’re being forced to listen to the same awful track on repeat. Thankfully, a 2022 agreement between the ACLU and the Department of Homeland Security guarantees that ICE won’t just hustle up to random folks and demand identification. That’s so comforting. But wait, you still need to know your rights: you have the right to remain silent, and the opportunity to ignore the chaos raging outside your door. What a time to be alive!

In case anyone gets too overwhelmed, the Resurrection Project has set up a hotline—because a little phone call will definitely ease the anxiety of potentially being forcibly removed from the land you’ve built a life in. Just dial 855-437-9345 and get educated, because knowledge is the best antidote to an oppressive regime, right?

As the Pilsen community bands together to prepare for yet another chapter in this saga, let’s raise a glass (of whatever you have on hand) to resilience in the face of governmental absurdity. In an era where every day is a challenge to human rights and dignity, it seems Chicago’s spirit is determined to prevail—albeit while dodging the looming presence of federal agents.

Stay tuned for the thrilling next installment in this never-ending saga of ludicrous policy and humanity’s fight back. The show is just getting started!